Most of us had real crappy sessions of sex education when we were young. I don’t know what the focus was for the guys but for the girls in my school, it was more about the menstrual cycle than actually about having sex and what is involved with it. Oh yes, they did show us how to use a condom I believe. One thing they never mentioned though, was lube.
With receiving minimal education on sex from our educators, most of us then just looked at what is portrayed in movies to get an idea of what sex is supposed to be like and what needs to be considered. I can tell you, by the way, the EXACT number of times that I saw couples using lube in movies… 0. It seems many have educated themselves on sex this way, because many assume that lube isn’t necessary. In movies they don’t use it and it seems to be no issue at all. Why pause for lube when you could just go straight for penetration?
Well… that’s what they SHOULD’VE explained during sex ed. If the vagina is not moist, it’s not ready for penetration. To do that anyway will result in PAIN for the lady, it will feel like she is being sanded with sandpaper rather than having sex. I understand that the deal with lube is as much unclear for ladies as for gents, so – gents: if your lady asks for lube, it’s for a reason, she’s the real live person in front of you who can tell you what things ACTUALLY feel like, she knows better than TV and movies. Your lady will appreciate you more for taking a break to apply lube when necessary than if you were to act just like the apparently good lovers in the movies.
So, what’s the deal with lube? If the vagina is not moist by itself, then you need to make it moist with lube before penetration. Whether the vagina is moist or not on its own depends on a number of factors. It varies from woman to woman, from the extent of arousal, from the phase in the menstrual cycle, etc. If the vagina is dry, it is often assumed to mean one of two things: 1, the lady is frigid – or 2, the gent is a crappy lover. Since neither lady or gent want to be tagged with those labels, penetration is often done even if he vagina is not moist enough, resulting in experiences I would not wish to anyone. So – understand that the vagina not being wet doesn’t have to mean either of those things and remember that lube was invented just for the purpose of adding lubrication when there isn’t enough already present. So, rather than trying to avoid lube at all cost, be grateful for it, find the one that works for both (if the lube stings you, try a different one!) and make it a permanent bedroom accessory.
Enjoy.